This will be an ‘alphabets flooded’ entry comprise of my recent feelings.
Classification: Emotional
The long lost feeling apparently returned to my heart, it moved me back to this place again.
The theme of this entry simply inspired by the song “Ni Bu Zhi Dao De Shi” by LeeHom, Wang LeeHom. LeeHom is a singer who distinct from some singer out there which earns solely by appearance, but LeeHom earns by talent, voice and inspiration as well as his appearance. No matter how long he missing in his field, he still got my attention when I heard people out there talking about his new song, new album or even the changes of his appearance. He is the singer that I like most among others. However, this doesn’t imply that I’m one of his fanatic, crazy or mad fans. I’m not obsessed to any artist/singer/idol in this land of the Creator. =)
Recently there is a person who always distracting me. Well, not physically distracting me, but mentally distracting me. I never knew that I could be this sad, down and unmotivated just because she did not give me attentions. I also never thought of this would happen again in my life after the previous girl who I loved. The reason why I never expected such situation will occur is because I do not want to fall in love with anyone til I completed my current chapter of my life. I had enough of sin that would indirectly hurt a girl. I don’t wanna be a malevolent guy anymore and I don’t wanna hurt anyone. “Ni Bu Zhi Dao De Shi” voiced out my hard and sad feeling towards my previous lover. I would not if I could is all I can say. I’m sorry but im happy as she got her Mr. Right. Crossed my heart and I say its truly from the bottom of my heart.
When ever I hurt someone the pain will definitely reflect back to me. When I scold people who I care I will tears, when I wanna wallop someone who I care, I will subconsciously stop my actions when I almost hit on them. While I love that person I would not want to hurt them although sometimes I did hurt them for goodness sake and God knows why.
And now, I officially declare that I having a crush on a girl. This girl giving a feeling that she could change my life if she wants. For sure, it’s for goodness sake again. Although sometimes people said “when you are in love, you would accidentally do something that is wrong for love sake ” but I also can tell you “sometime our intuition would help to remind us who we are and where we stand ”. In every situation I swear I would want to be her Mr. Right.
As I always wondering, waiting, stalking and gazing at her facebook profile just because I need her attention to make my life lighten up once again. Every single small thing she did, she got my attention for sure. I don’t know why, it’s the love on first sight that cause me fell in love with her. I don’t wish for more, but a piece of her care/attention would keep me alive. I wonder when will be the right time for me to confess. When will she open up a window for me to look into her heart?
Nobody knows..
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