Monday, May 26, 2008

The Contract Of Love

Hi everyone..I'm back with a new thought..well, recently my life quite ok..although maybe it will get worsen soon..but I have faith that I can cope with it..todays entry is "The Contract Of Love"..whats brings up this entry?..its a story of a marriage couple..what is the definition of "Marriage"?..it define as "the contract made by a man and woman to live as husband and wife" and also "the state or relationship of being husband and wife"..being husband and wife isn't something that we should simply decide with feelings for each other..it needs a lot of faith, confidence, trust, and believe that both husband and wife can lives, talk, discuss and love each other, not for one day, one weeks, one month or one year, but is forever..nowadays what I see most is the breaking up of couples, divorce of marriage couple, and quarrel in the family..i really feel pathetic for them..what makes them to be together at the 1st point?..is it simply just by the word "okay" and the word "I do" which answered with simply just the feelings?..to me the contract of love is a contract that onces it stated, its forever the both party have to keep their promise as they contracted..why in this world there are still some marriage couple counting with each other about what they sacrificed for each other?..is it that important to count with each other of what they committed for each other?..I felt it shouldn't be in this way..what had committed shouldn't take it out as a weapon to defense themselves when quarrel arose..

Yesterday i heard of a story from the wife..the wife told me the story when she was young and why she chosen this husband as her partner who walks together with her in the journey of her life..she told me how much she had committed in this love but end up the husband having affair behind her..she claims that its not her fault and said she regretted to have him as her husband..but actually both of them have their own fault..the husband is a very ego guy..and the wife is a very depending lady..in my opinion the wife shouldn't depend so much on the husband for everything..she should be more independent rather than depend so much on the husband which will increase the burden of the husband..
and this was the ending of being too dependent..now the wife going on the journey of her life without the husband..although they didn't divorce but she being neglected..the wife asked my opinion that the husband still love her or not..seriously I cant answer her..but i felt that the husband begin to feel fed up of his wife attitude which only know how to make herself drunk and splurging a lot on alcoholic drinks..everyone who loves her did advice her not to torture herself with alcoholic drinks..she ain't listening..she told me she know she shouldn't do such silly stuff..but she cant sleep well in the night because the husband wasn't on the same bed and beside her anymore..the love is cracking.. the husband did advise her not to drink, but she fell into alcohol trap..in other word, she addicted to alcohol..the matter already concluded in this way..what can she do anymore?..the another lady already own a son of the husband..if the wife want the husband to get away from the lady, indirectly she is asking her husband to be an irresponsible man..

one night, her child who sad watching how his mother torture herself asked her, "mom, if you divorce with dad, will your life gets better? If yes, I will talk with lil sis..mom, lil sis and I don't wish to see you live in this way..we are hurt mom..because we as your child loves you more than you can imagine.."..the wife answered "my child, it will be the same..I still remember how much I committed in this family, in this love but your dad having affair behind me, once and twice I help him to settle his problem, he needs financial assistance, I give him, he want me to resign and help him, I did..but why he want to treat me like this?..im not worth have such return from him..why I don't want to divorce is because I love you both my child and I believe he still love me..I still remember last time when I ask for divorce, his tears flowing out because he don't want..a man who shed tears in front of his wife because he still love her..besides don't want to give my child a broken family too..but..if one day, your father ask for divorce, I will accept it..because he don't love me anymore..but now I am not sure as last time that he still love me..can you tell me he still love me or not?.."..the child couldn't answer her because he not sure either his father still love his wife or not..but what on the surface shown is the husband begin to fed up with his wife for taking so much alcoholic drinks..she even promised her son that she will try harder to stop drinking that night..will she keep her promise?..I don't know..

to whoever reading this, what is your opinion for this case?..what will you do if you in the shoes of the child of the married couple..


..:::..EnD..:::..

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

hi fle, i strongly recommend you to have a talk with your dad and mom in a room just u guys. ask them to solve the problem because this is not just hurting you and your sister, but your mom's healthy. I think this is the best way because they all escaping the fact that the marriage is broken. In their age, it is hard to accept a divorce. Tell them how you feel and your sister. They must walk on their life or provide an unhealthy family for you and your sister!!!!

Anonymous said...

hi flev
.. i'd recommend you to set up a talk of your dad, your mom, and you. I think your family really need a talk. your dad sounds like hiding and not facing the fact. They look at diverce and marriage are different from our generation. During the talk, i recommend you tell them how you feel and how their marriage affect you and your sister. You and your sis need a healthy family, especially your sister, in her teen age. I hope this advice helps you a little. I think they need more communication. Good Luck!!!